Tug Of War

I have been feeling this pull between my child and unborn child lately. I have been getting just a taste of what it feels like to care for two little ones. I am feeling the pressure to provide and care for Elliana, while at the same time having a bit of a challenge trying to divide my time between both children. (Elliana and this one in the making). I found myself crying about it last night. Just sitting there in tears over the fact that Elliana is not going to get my 100% full attention anymore and that I will have to adjust and learn the skill of giving both of my children effective one on one time. I just fear that Elliana will feel left out, or less important. Time is so short, I've got 6 months left to do my best to try and prepare her for this new role as, "Big sister".

Elliana at age 15 months. Possible future soccer champ. 

This pregnancy is going great now, we started out there with kind of a rough start with me feeling SO terrribly sick and all. Thankfully, I am finally feeling the second trimester, "honeymoon period" kick in. No more sickness. I got my energy back. Just all around feeling pretty great! Of course more emotional than ever but it's a relief this time to know that these up and down roller coaster emotions are 100% normal and that I am NOT just going physco and am in need of professional help like I thought I did last pregnancy. LOL. Anyway I am sorry of this is turning out to be more of a rant. I just have a lot of cooped up emotions that need to be thrust out into the open. I need to blog more often you guys! I apologize that I have been absent for, well forever and a day. I admit, consistancy at blogging is not one of my strong points. 

Elliana playing imaginary sword wars with a stick. :)

You'll have to be ever so kind and just over look it, this season of my life has been quite a busy one. Not to make any of you readers feel neglected but blogging...well, just say that it felt like there wasn't enough time in one day to get much done at all! Now that we are finally getting some what settled into our new home, things feel like they are slowing down a bit more so expect more frequent blog posts! :) OK back to the topic --sorry my thoughts are quite scattered at the moment. I feel all over the place today! Ha! This blog post is just a refelction of how I am feeling. Gotta' love 2nd trimester mood swings! Eh? I know I am usually the one giving all of YOU advice but that isn't what this blog is about. There is no shame in getting off your soap box every now and again! Now I need YOUR advice. Can any of you Mom's out there understand what I'm feeling right now? As far as that, "pull" goes... almost like a tug of war between you and all of your other children? How do you divide your time and attention between children and connect and communicate effectively? Did you start preparing your older child for your younger child like myself to get ready and prepare to be a big sister when little sibling was still cookin' in the oven? Or did you wait until after to really make that adjustment, and really hung on to that one on one time that you had left before your other little one was born? Thoughts? Advice? I'll take! 

One diaper at a time,
-Tina